Forgive Me
by Impersonating-an-entity
Summary: Based on Evanescence's 'Forgive Me' from the album Origin. Touya apologizes to Jin.


Disclaimers: What? O, yes, YYH is mine! Thanks, I think it's good too. And the song is mine too. It does sound like one of Evanescence's song, doesn't it? LOL No, YYH belongs to other ppl, and the song is Evanescence's.  
  
Warnings: shonen-ai... that's it.... Gasp  
  
Oh, Jin. I've done it again. I love you; you know I do. But once again, I've said something to upset you. I don't even know what it is I said. All I know is I said it, and I've hurt you. I didn't mean it, whatever it was. Can you forgive me? Can you forgive me, even though I make this same mistake so often? Why do we fight, and argue? I love you so much, Jin. Why do I hurt you? Why do I say these things, let slip accursed words of pain? I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Can you forgive me? I've done it again.  
  
_Can you forgive me again, _

_I don't know what I said  
  
But I didn't mean to hurt you_  
  
When I heard what I said, I felt like dieing inside. Why did I say it? I looked at your pained expression, and my heart shattered, like the ice I master. You looked away, in shame, and anger, and hurt pride, and sadness. Then you looked at me, and your eyes... I love your eyes, Jin... but just then... they scared me. Your eyes terrified me then. And these regrets twist my soul. It terrified me, to see how much power you let me have over you. You stopped shouting. You were just silent. I didn't mean to hurt you. Oh, Jin, why do you let me wield such power? I said those words, and struck a fatal blow to both our hearts. You looked so weak then. You seemed... like I'd taken the wind from you. Like I'd stolen the wind straight from your youki. I'm sorry.  
  
_I heard the words come out _

_I felt that I would die; _

_it hurts so much to hurt you. _

_Then you look at me _

_You're not shouting anymore _

_You're silently broken_  
  
I wish I could take it back. I wish I could make it so I'd never said those hurtful words. To erase them from your ears and memory, I'd give the world. To hear the words for you, I'd give anything. How can I fix it? I feel this way every time I do this. Every time I say something that hurts you, I regret it. I regret it, and I am so sorry. I cry, afterwards, for you. Tear tracks of ice run frozen over my cheeks, as my ice freezes the tears that fall. I don't want to lose you; you're the only thing that really matters to me. You know that. If I don't have you, I don't have anything. But somehow, I know, you don't need me. You love me; I know. But you don't really need me. You can be happy without me. You can be happy with anyone; I'm not so special. I can't hope to complete you- you are already complete! I can never complete you as you complete me. I need you to survive, but you can live alone. All I do for you is hurt, when I make these stupid mistakes. I'm so sorry.  
  
_I'd give anything now _

_To hear those words for you _

_Each time I say something I regret I cry, _

_I don't want to lose you _

_But somehow I know that _

_you will never need me, yeah!  
_  
I think some deity made you for me. You make up for all the problems in my life. One day, I'll show you. One day, I'll be able to. I'll show you how you complete me; how you genuinely make me happy, with your silly antics. I don't think you quite see, just how valuable you are to me. It's so true though. I can't live without you. You don't know that. Don't ever leave me, Jin, please! I love you, so much! I won't live without you, ever again. My life before I met you was nothing but cold and dark. And now, I've grown used to your warmth and light. I suppose I'm getting pampered. But I won't live without Light and warmth again. I won't live without you again. Please, don't ever leave me. Stay, your hand clasped around mine, forever, I beg you.  
  
_'Cuz you were made for me. _

_Somehow I'll make you see _

_How happy you make me_

_ I can't live this life _

_Without you by my side _

_I need you to survive_

_ So stay with me_  
  
I have to wonder why you put up with me. You're so beautiful, Jin. You are. You have such nice, soft, curly, crimson hair. That pale, ruddy complexion, like those ningens who share your accent, is so warm and inviting. I believe, Irish, is what they call themselves, those ningens. Freckles, dusted over your nose and cheeks has appealing, child-like innocence. Your pointy ears amuse me to know end. And your eyes... Those deep, sapphire pools. I could look in them forever. My eyes are blue too. But they are nothing to yours. Your eyes are deep and warm and happy. Mine are shallow, and pale, and icy cold. You would compliment me, by saying my eyes were so beautiful, they seemed cut from a mighty glacier. But my eyes are ugly. Compared to you, I'm so ugly. I'm so ugly, no matter who you compare me too. You look into my eyes, so unlike yours, and you see. You hear my silent scream – I'm so ugly. You hear my silent scream – I love you. You hear my silent scream – I'm sorry. My silent scream – I'm unworthy.  
  
_You look in my eyes and _

_I'm screaming inside  
  
That I'm so ugly!  
  
So ugly!  
_  
((ummm yes, I have been informed it actually goes 'I'm so sorry, so sorry', but upon listening, this is what I got, and, since I don't desire to re- write the whole paragraph, I leave the error in))  
  
Can you forgive me? I'm so sorry I hurt you. I'm so sorry I said those things. I love you. I love you, forever. You're my only friend. You're my lover, true. But you're also my friend. And you're the only friend I've got in this world. Or any world. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I would take it back in a heartbeat, if I could. I'm so sorry. Forgive me again, please. I don't ever want to hurt you. I love you.  
  
_Can you forgive me again? _

_You're my one true friend _

_And I never meant to hurt you_


End file.
